I will never trust in god completely and blindly again. I've learnt my lesson and the folly of my past methods will not be repeated. Now I know and understand how I put myself up for disposal, betrayal, and destruction. I thought in my lifetime, all I had to worry about was the devil. Silly me.
Lesson learnt.
I'm not gonna be the sucker caught unprepared. No reversion will be tolerated. Just fucking try me.
That's it, right?
When I think of it now, I feel somewhat anxious and excited, less apprehensive than before. Amidst the fear, I now look forward to accepting and embracing the next chapter. Its not just foreboding and fear anymore. The transition will be a bitch but they always are so no use whining.
Just gotta man up.
" A true suicide is a paced disciplined certainty. People pontificate, 'suicide is a coward's act'. Couldn't be further from the truth. Suicide takes tremendous courage."
”I believe there is a another world waiting for us... A better world. And I’ll be waiting for you there.”
-Robert Frobisher, Cloud Atlas, 2012
Wait for me. One day soon, I will come and tell you your name. I will hold your hand so you won't be alone anymore. I will tell you how I missed and loved you.
I know you and I have seen you once, though not for long, I will not forget you.
Wait for me, I will claim you, for you are wanted. I am sorry I lost you, but I won't ever abandon you.
Be patient a little longer, my little one.
What a load of horseshit, oh my fucking god. Reading through this blog totally tells me what a pompous douchebag I've become. I have to restructure my posts.
Makes me wanna vomit, then scoop it up, and shove it down my throat again.
You want this? Then you better do that.
You want this? Then you better say that.
You want this? Then you better have that.
You need this? Then you better be that.
And that, is how much it costs.
